From every hair tip and dandruff on my scalp to the dirt under my toenails and the fungus on my feet, the unconditional love of the Self embraces me in total accepting awareness.
In the deepest layers of pain and the frozen traumatic memories, in every vicious recursive thought-circle, and the darkest pits of gangrenous self-hate; there is her light, her subtle fragrance, her whisper to every version of every JJ at every age he was traumatized that her was never ever alone.
The Beloved’s mercy is truly boundless, she loves my most rotten pieces just as fanatically as my soul Her love is such that was never a gap or break and not even a concept of forgiving: such is the unconditional love of the unconditional awareness.
I surrender
This JJ: this personality: a space I do not like to enter: I enter.
As JJ, I surrender my desires to the loving bounty of the Self.
As JJ, I surrender my desperate loneliness in trust to the Self.
As JJ, I surrender my mother, my family, my sister, my brothers, my aunts, and all my family to the care and love the Self.
As JJ, I surrender my sadness, my sorrows, and my pain to the ever spacious ever-loving self.
As JJ, the conscious personality, I surrender my bank accounts, my work, my responsibilities, my debts and debt collectors, my money, and income to the eternal self-energized self.
As JJ, I surrender my guilt, my anger, my unresolved emotions, my health, my longevity, my body and psyche into the ever-present all perceiving all healing light of the omniscient Self.
As JJ, I surrender my arrogance, my self-will, my self-hatred, my darkness, my virtue, my opinions, my innocence, my truth, my knowledge, my insights, my understanding, my expectations, my hopes, my dreams, my education, my name, my self-identity, my nationality, my languages, my speech, my skills, my thoughts, my mind, my hands, my concerns, my preferences, my disgusts, my memories, my items, my sins, my merits, my household chores, my small delights; chocolate, ice cream, my psychic abilities, my talking to God, my life-span, my soul, and my soul-mission – I surrender every vibration in and of my being, as JJ: the conscious present and responsible personality, in an act of absolute trust, to the eternally merciful Self.
As JJ, I surrender the relief of being suddenly burdenless to the eternally unburdened Self.